Make it Snappy

Balikpapan, Borneo island, Indonesia (map)

In this blog: a strange friend, spolt by local ladies, flight nightmares and a crocodile farm.

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After a month where the longest I'd stayed anywhere was four days, I wanted to stop. I was tired of the road, tired of moving, just tired. In a funny way then it was fortunate then that the city of Balikpapan was nice but boring - a good place for a bit of normality of sorts. But even when i do everything in my power to have a quiet week including spending three days solid on a computer - fun and games still seem to follow and interesting things happen.

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After the epic boat journey we'd had the week before up the Mahakam river, Rene (my Canadian travel buddy) and I arrived back at the city of Samarinda and took a bus to Balikpapan, a journey uneventful bar a busker briefly walking onto the bus playing guitar which made us smile. Once in Balikpapan centre it was back to civilisation, or so it felt anyway. We headed straight to the bakery, after ten days or so without bread left us craving carbs like you wouldn't believe. We then set about finding somewhere to stay, but every place we found was either full, expensive or grotty, and it took a frustrating and sweaty two hours of lots of walking about to finally find a bed - thankfully a fairly rare occurrence on this trip. We relaxed for a bit, walked along a dodgy waterfront market, had tea at a funky cafe with a live band, then passed a party we spotted earlier only to find we'd annoyingly just missed out on free food for all. 

The next three days were a blur of computers - two full days of writing blogs on my tablet in the room, then one day copying and uploading pictures in an ear-poppingly noisy and sweaty internet cafe; it all takes forever. The evenings provided some light relief though. I shaved off a five-week travel beard, wandered past a little cafe called 'Bude' (like the Cornish town), then watched some guys playing chess on the street. A local guy got chatting to us - a commercial diver, who upon hearing we'd done some diving recently, instantly whipped out his tablet, and full of joy and excitement showed us underwater videos he'd downloaded from the internet.

Another night we fancied a beer, but being a Muslim country it can be hard to get hold of at times. We asked a guy on the street and he pointed up towards some market stalls and getting there, we asked the owner. She nodded gently, as if to say 'yes, but keep it quiet' and told us a price. As ever in Asia we tried to negotiate, only for her to shake her head in disgust at the price and totally offended, walked away back to her friend. We were as shocked as her, that never happens! When we asked another guy nearby his eyes darted from side to side, before he reached under the counter and quickly pulled out two bottles and put them straight into our rucksacks like nothing had happened, as if it was a drug deal or something.

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Stenly

We were having a wander one evening when a young local guy casually said hello and introduced himself as Stenly, a pleasant but slightly strange young freelance English teacher. 'That's not a very Indonesian name' I pointed out and he agreed without explanation. We asked for a recommendation for somewhere to eat, and he pointed out a place and walked off, before catching us up again saying 'actually there's a better place across the road' and led us there. 'Across the road' ended up being a mile away up a hill, and after an excellent buffet of fish dishes he suggested taking a bus back, which he assumed we would pay his share of. It was cheap, so fine. We went into the Internet cafe where he said he was going in the first place and whilst we spent two hours there, oddly didn't actually use a computer and just sat there chatting or texting.

The following evening Rene and I went to the cinema to see 'Edge of Tomorrow' and he asked if he could tag along. Without realising it we had inadvertently bought tickets in a VIP screen before he arrived where there was just thirty huge plush electric recliners, acres of legroom, a call button for drinks and popcorn, and a blanket each to tackle the ice cold aircon. I'd never experienced anything like it, and at £2.75 it was a complete luxurious bargain. Afterwards when it came to paying though, Stenly said he'd forgotten his wallet saying he'd meet the next morning to pay us back. He never showed up nor replied to any messages. It was only a couple of quid each so the money was incidental, and in the end we decided that he just saw us as rare white 'friends' who could afford to treat him. However, this money soon balanced back out as you'll read later.

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Crocs

Balikpapan is a pleasant city thanks to money from an economy based around the many offshore oil platforms nearby, but is pretty short on anything interesting to see. This was fine with us as we wanted a break from sightseeing, but one attraction was too much to resist - a nearby crocodile farm. It was a proper hoohaa to get there thanks to a bus driver mishearing where we wanted to go and a one hour journey turned into nearly three, but it was worth it. 

The bus dropped us in an unassuming spot and we wandered down a quiet lane between some buildings, eventually finding the complex of delapated buildings that formed this commercial crocodile farm which reared hundreds of these brutes for their meat and skin. Inside were a number of concrete pens, which we soon discovered were held shut with nothing but toilet door latches or bits of bent wire - I kid you not! I tentatively looked over the wall for my first glimpse, and the hairs on my neck stood on end briefly. They were grouped by age and pretty packed in, often lying on top of one another motionless, expect for the occasional splash as they quickly moved into the water. 

I motioned to one of the staff to ask where the crocs were killed and he pointed over a wall, so I climbed on a bench for a peek, quite taken back to find the peculiar scene of hundreds of decapatated crocodile heads laying on top of cages. Outside as a side attraction a couple of elephants with chains round their ankles grazed in a field, and some monkeys were kept in small rubbish strewn pens, not very pleasant and the stuff of nightmares for animal rights activists I imagine. I probably only encouraged this more when upon seeing an old guy offering, spontaneously decided to break a phobia of mine by holding a snake for the first time. The skin felt like latex, and the bones were very prominent underneath though thankfully it didn't really wriggle much. It's mouth was curiously held shut with Sellotape, but whilst a little creepy at first, the experience was actually quite tolerable. Another 'things to do before you die' box ticked.

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With the babies

Personal space? Pah!

The butcher's yard

Where next?

Borneo is a big island and in my mind without thinking I was going to see it all, until Rene mentioned he was thinking of moving on. It had been two months since I arrived from Singapore, and as much as I love Borneo's wild beauty and off the beaten track adventures, suddenly I realised I needed a change. It was time to move on. For a few days it looked like our travel partnership was coming to an end, as we both had different plans since Rene had visas to get for the journey ahead, but at the last moment he worked out a different way of doing things and decided to join me to the crazy looking (on a map at least) Sulawesi island.

The ferry schedule to get there didn't work with our timing, so once again I found myself in the position on trying to book a flight for the same day. It's not normally a major issue as prices don't really go up last-minute in Asia - but on this occasion things conspired against us with flights going up in cost before our eyes, selling out, two lots of payment problems and having to stay another night. After a whole frustrating afternoon disappeared by, eventually we resorted to a good old-fashioned travel agent nearby who surprisingly did it for the same price, and our Borneo exit was sorted.

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Kept men

One night for the week Rene and I stopped at a quiet bar on the waterfront for a drink and got talking to the owner - a 27 year old girl called Ubai (short for Djubaidah), a petite, pretty and chatty 'businesswoman' as she called herself, divorced with a seven year old son. Little did we know what was going to follow!

I mentioned to her I was going to get a haircut the next day. 'I'll show you where to go if you like' she said, so Rene and I met up late the following afternoon with Ubai and her friend Liona. It turned out the place was a few miles away, and she insisted on chauffeuring us there in her shiny one week old Honda wagon. Arriving at this fancy mall the hairdressers there was way too fancy and expensive for my backpacker budget, so we went for seafood soup and rice in a restaurant nearby and Ubai insisted on paying. She then took us to a little neighbourhood barbers nearby where they pruned Rene's mop and travellers beard into a work of art then butchered too much from mine, and this time Liona insisted on paying - the grand sum of £0.75 each! 

The girls had planned to go out to a bar that night and invited us to join them, so a couple of hours later Ubai and another friend of her's - Nila, an accountant, collected us and drove a few miles out of town. We reached Joy's bar, full of mostly foreign male expats and local women, and was pretty lively with it's live band and people getting up and dancing on the bar. Most of the expats work locally in the oil and coal industries, and one of them, a chubby double-chinned Kiwi guy who deals with hydraulics came and chatted for a while, crushing our hands with the most almighty of handshakes and proclaiming his love for living in Balikpapan. The owner Jerry introduced himself and handed us a free tequila, whilst a local girl beat every person in the house (including me) at pool. We met loads of people through the girls and had a great night out, yet once again when it came to paying our bar bill at the end of the night, we found the girls had already done it and once again wouldn't accept our share - over £25 of it! As we had a flight the next day, we said goodbye and went home in disbelief at the generosity.

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It wasn't over though 'cause the next afternoon I received a message asking if we'd like to hang out before our flight, so with a few hours to spare Ubai again drove the four of us to a smart beachside restaurant where the moneyed middle-class hang out, and we had a few fruit juices and chatted away for a couple of hours. Their English was excellent having worked for international companies based locally, and despite our insistence otherwise, the bill was paid again and we were dropped at the airport before saying goodbye. 

Rene and I sat in the departure lounge a little dazed by the whole experience. On reflection we decided it was a mixture of the Indonesian warmness we'd experienced previously, and maybe just a little bit of Indonesian women using their money to attract western men, even if they didn't push that idea too much. You know these stories you hear about western men buying foreign brides? Well, in a strange turn of events somehow the opposite nearly happened to us. There's no wedding bells, but a fun story all the same. 

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So after two months on Borneo, the third largest island in the world, that's it. I knew it wasn't going to be the untapped paradise it sounded and once was, but I was still surprised by both how developed it is, and just how much it's been ruined by logging and other more dirty industries. There's still an amazing amount of natural beauty though in the primary rainforest when you find it, and some very exotic plants and creatures. Was it what I expected? Yes, and more.

Busker on the bus

Rene desperate to tuck in

Indonesian's like to adapt their scooters for all sorts of purposes

Hard day at work

Rene, Nila, Ubai and I by the beach

The End / The Start

Jaipur, India 

In this episode of Be There Dreckly... I have my first cutthroat shave by a barber, break into a fort, get stoned by a teenager and celebrate New Years Eve on a rooftop...

After a fantastic Christmas in Agra, I moved a hundred odd miles west to the city of Jaipur, known as the as the Pink City due to the colour of the buildings in it's historic walled centre. Leaving Agra Fort station at daybreak, and only forty minutes late this time, the train passed through mostly wasteland alongside some very poor neighbourhoods. The lack of toilet facilities was very apparent, with hundreds of people squatting and deficating amongst the rubbish by the tracks with no apparent shame.

Once in the countryside though things were a lot more pleasant, mostly flat with the odd isolated hill, with large green fields of crops including rapeseed - a very common crop in India. After only seeing small scale farming until now, it was interesting to see agriculture that appeared to be more mechanised, and with 1.3 billion mouths to feed I guess it needs to be. Once again I took advantage of the lack of health and safety rules in India, and spent an hour or so hanging out the train door, carefully holding the rails both sides and taking in the nice scenery, something I must say I absolutely love doing. I am of course very careful before anyone worries!

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At Jaipur, I walked to the hotel, brushing off heaps of extremely irritating and persistent rickshaw drivers vying for business. They seemed to be worse here than anywhere else so far. I managed to find a room at Pearl Palace, known as one of the best guesthouses in the state of Rajasthan, certainly the best place I've stayed on the whole trip so far, and a bargain at £5 a night for a very swish double. I headed off towards the centre on foot, getting completely lost and taking a cycle rickshaw a couple of miles to get back on track. Some people feel these are degrading for the rider, other say it gives valuable income to some of the poorest people. I agree with the latter, if I was in their position I'd feel no shame in carting people round on a bike to earn a living, and don't tend to haggle the fare as they definitely earn it. It was hilarious to pass two men on bikes, one on each end of a long ladder as they rode with it up a fairly busy road. When they came to turn off across traffic it was nearly a real Laurel and Hardy moment!

I wandered around the centre for a while, passing by the touristy places like the palace and observatory. I've seen enough already on this trip, and only tend to pick and choose only those that really interest me now. What I won't get bored of, is wandering about the real bits of the city where people are going about their daily lives. I've mentioned before cows are free to wander the streets in India, and in Jaipur at times it seemed like the streets were a giant farmyard. I saw cows, oxen, goats, pigs, chickens and even a couple of sheep wandering about, mostly picking scraps out from the rubbish, and occasionally being given a bit of fresh veg or grain.  Apparently most of them have owners, but they just don't have land on which to keep them, and cows being sacred and protected by law, are thus allowed to go wherever they want. 

The small shops of Jaipur were neatly grouped together, so you walk along passing hardware shops, then fabric shops, then paint shops, spice shops, loose tea shops, cabinet shops, ingredients, bangles, cooking oil, and barbers. I looked briefly through the window of a barbers as I passed and ten metres later just stopped. On a whim I decided to go back and have a quick trim. Now, in Sweden the cheapest haircut I saw was £14, in Germany I paid £10, but here, it's the grand sum of £0.50! However, I got what I paid for - the guy spoke good English and seemed to understand when I asked him to cut off a very small amount, only to immediately chop nearly two inches straight off before I could stop him! Once he'd finished, he offered me a cutthroat shave. 

I looked at the Indian guy next to me who was having one, and having never had it before thought it would be a good experience. It's a pretty never racking having a stranger using a razor blade so close to your throat, a real test of faith! He was very particular in applying a base cream, then lathering on shaving foam for minute or two, carefully shaving all over, washing it all off and finally applying aftershave. I was ready to pay up, but he then offered a facial massage. He was a good salesman, and intrigued again I said yes. He took a machine out of the cupboard that looked a like a drill but with a vibrating disc on the end, and slowly worked it all over my face. It felt very unnatural, and when he put right on my ears, quite painful! Finally, he offered a head massage. I'd gone this far, so why not. Once again very pleasant, and with a grand total of £2 (200 rupees) shelled out for this hour-long experience, I left the place feeling like a new man. 

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Nahargarh Fort is set up in the hills and looms over Jaipur itself. The next morning I intended to hike up there rather than take the very long windy route up in a taxi like everyone else. After walking most of the way from the hotel, I took a rickshaw the remaining short distance to the base of the hill, so I could get the driver could show me where the path started, as it was supposedly a bit tricky to find. But like many of these cockroaches, the driver made it his duty to keep stopping and starting at hotels along the way where he'd get commission if I stayed, then persistently try to make me hire his driving services for the whole day. 

He wouldn't take no for an answer and eventually my patience ran out at one such stop, so in a rare bout of rudeness I dropped part of the fare on the ground for him to gather up, and walked off. Hopefully he got the message. However, this meant finding the path was very difficult, and after a lot of searching amongst the jumble of houses, I found what I thought was the route on the map. A local showed me the way up an alley and through someone's backyard, and I scrambled up a steep rocky hill, disappointingly  finding that gate into the fort was locked after half an hours hiking. 'I guide you, fifty rupees' said a couple of kids of around ten, who were hanging round the path. I declined again and again for five minutes, whilst they followed me and grabbed my arm. 

Eventually all I could do to loose them was raise my voice and firmly tell them to leave. As I walked along the wall of the fort trying to find another entrance, next thing I know a few stones seemed to be landing around me. I turned to find one of their teenage mates lobbing golf ball-sized rocks from a fifty metres or so away. I covered my head and moved on rapidly out of his range, but to find no other entrance to the fort. Not wanting to go all the way back down the hill through all the rabble, against my better judgement I reluctantly paid the kids the fifty rupees to show me how to get in. To my surprise one of them clambered up a twelve foot high section of wall into the fort, the only way it transpired. Great. I felt safe doing it, and it was an easy enough climb with lots of hand and footholds, so I was soon in. A few minutes later, looking back down on where I'd first encountered these delinquents, they were back flying kites together, back to being normal kids. The first time in over five months that I've encountered any form of aggression from other people.

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The fort was largely overgrown inside, though the old palace at one end of the complex was interesting enough to look around, a place where an old leader used to keep his many mistresses. It was quite modest as far as palaces go, and not too gaudy and over the top. After leaving it was then apparent that I'd gone up completely the wrong path earlier that day, as I found the actual nicely paved route back to the town! I couldn't get over how many friendly people said hello as I walked past the houses and shops outside of the centre. Nor how many kites were being flown - the sky was full of them!

Back at the hotel, I was unlocking the bedroom door when someone came out of the next room. Well blow me down, it was Wayne who I'd spent Christmas with! He'd just turned up on his bike from Agra. Wayne is a fascinating guy, extremely knowledgable and full of stories. A 43 year old construction project manager from Manchester, he's spent the past four years cycling around Europe, Africa, the Middle East and now Asia, covering over 50,000 miles so far, and now visiting his 91st country! See his blog if you're interested - wmhafrica.blogspot.com . As you might expect we had a lot in common so got on well and hung out together for a couple of days. He had many incredible stories, and to be honest I've not met anyone before with such a good general knowledge of the world and it's history. I learnt more about the establishment of Israel and it's problems, how borders between countries is a fairly modern phenomenon, life in Africa and central Asia, the problems Britain has caused over the years in many problems in the world, and much much more. In return I told him a bit about cows and engineering! 

Monkey temple

After a relaxing breakfast the next morning, we walked, bussed and rickshawed our way to the nearby village of Galta which houses the 'monkey temple' - a complex of buildings in a narrow valley, amongst which thousands of mostly rhesus monkeys hang out. At first it wasn't apparent how many there were, but over time you start to spot them everywhere in the buildings, on the path, in the trees and up in the hills. All pretty passive, and quite a sight. On the way back down, in a grimy little backstreet we found an interesting local cafe by chance, and tried some interesting  new Indian dishes. We had first a giant but very thin omelette which was fried until crispy, and rolled up with curried veg inside, then afterwards a kind of Indian pizza. Both excellent, and I've not seen them anywhere before or since.

The next day was New Years Eve, and I woke up feeling under the weather with a cold, the first of any sort of illness so far on this trip. Probably something to do with sitting in the hotel's rooftop restaurant 'til too late the night before - it's been warmish by day but fairly cold by night. I felt pretty shoddy that day so just took it easy for the day and caught up with some blog and photo stuff mostly. 

I was feeling marginally better by tea time, and ended up spending the evening with people solely from my home country for the first time on this trip - with again Wayne, and an English couple I'd met in the day. The four of us were talking away and having a few beers in the hotel, until suddenly we realised it was 11.30pm and we needed to find a party for midnight. We ended up on the rooftop of the hotel next door, where they had a traditional Indian band playing and about thirty other tourists. At midnight people shouted out the countdown, and the staff set off fireworks from a terrace above. It was the dodgiest fireworks display I've ever witnessed, with the tubes being balanced on the edge of a wall and people running around everywhere, but was very good and certainly memorable, even if it wasn't the biggest, best or wildest New Years event I've been to. 

Midnight fireworks

A big thanks to everyone who has followed the blog through the journey so far. I'm now getting between 8 and 25 visitors a day from a number of counties, which makes it well worth doing, even if it's a bit of a tie sometimes. Stay in touch, your feedback is always appreciated. Happy New Year everybody, and all the best for 2014!

Munich: cars, castles and camps

Munich, Germany

When planning this trip, I was thinking about the sort of things I'd like to see and do, and for some reason more than any other place, these things seemed to revolve around Munich. Unfortunately for you that means an extra long blog! It's an interesting city in many ways - close to the alps, a bit of a hub of German engineering, hosts the biggest beer festival in the world, and on a more grim note - is the birthplace of the Nazi movement.

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The first night I arrived I got chatting in the kitchen to an English guy called Darren who's working in Munich; Really interesting guy and we got on really well throughout the week.The kitchen seemed to be the place to socialise. I often had breakfast the same time as either some Aussie girls or an American girl and her Dad, met loads of English and Italians who were there for work, and one night, a group of four Russian guys. We got chatting, and they said they said they were on holiday for a week or so around Europe, and had spent nearly the same amount of dosh in that time boozing it up, as I'd spent on my whole trip so far! Naturally they had vodka and offered me shot - I obliged despite it being 6pm, followed by a pancake they'd just cooked, filled with Russian caviar. Living the life eh!

The first full day in Munich, I had quite a bit to sort out - boring stuff, like banking, emails, planning, booking, finding flights etc etc - and decided to write the day off to get stuff sorted in one hit. After lunch I nipped out and get my first haircut in a while which was interesting in itself - the guy didn't speak as good English as I initially believed, so I was given some hairstyle picture books and had to pick out the one I wanted - a bit like buying a haircut from a catalogue. The upside after was that because of the language issues there was no boring small talk at all!

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DJ Shadow

How's this for a lucky chance:
At 8pm that night, I  Googled 'gigs in Munich this week'.
At 9pm that night, I was at a gig watching DJ Shadow!

Shadow is a very innovative and skilled US record producer and DJ who you've probably never heard of but whom I've been a fan of for years, and was doing a DJ set at a club just down the road. I went along on the off chance they had tickets available, only to find they did, and spent the next couple of hours watching him flick between hip hop, soul, funk and dance music in a way I've never seen before.

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The next day I headed into the city to the city museum. I had no interest in a lot of it, but because I paid I looked anyway - but finished with the bit that I went for - a section on Munich's role in the Nazi era. Basically Hitler rose to power in Munich - it was both the birthplace and capital of the Nazi movement. I didn't learn about WWII at school so my knowledge is really patchy, but I'm quite interested and want to learn more, and where better than Germany. The nation is completely ashamed with it's past, but has moved forward whilst being quite open about what happened.  The museum showed this era in detail, with many original documents, propaganda posters and pieces of Nazi memorabilia. There was little gore in the exhibition, but I felt pretty uncomfortable by the end of it.

Having heard many good things about Couchsurfing recently, I became a member of the website, which allows you to arrange to stay with locals in different cities in exchange for people staying with you one day. I've had no luck at all with finding hosts so far, but I saw there was a social meet up for travellers and hosts arranged in Munich that evening, so thought I'd go along and see what it was all about. Most people hadn't met before so there were no social barriers, and it was quite a fun night - just a couple of beers in a nearby bar, chatting to some French, Czech and Polish people.

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I seem to have been to quite a few museums on this trip, which admittedly sounds a bit dull but they've all generally been good in different ways. Wednesday was one of the best - a trip to the Deutsches Museum - the biggest museum of technology and science in the world - it was quite incredible, and I learnt tons. And so huge I only saw maybe a quarter of it in a whole day - mostly on engineering machinery, metals, photography, green energy and space travel. Every day's a schoolday on this trip.

BMW Factory & museum

Thursday was BMW day. Munich is it's founding place, and home of it's main factory. I started off in BMW Welt (world), which is a showcase of everything about the company in a stunning building. I then went across the road to look around the rather large and impressive BMW museum, and finished up on a factory tour. As a car lover it seems I'm on a bit of a car pilgrimage on this trip - this was now my fourth car factory tour, and I must say probably the best. It was very professional, walking on overhead gantries around the plant, and unlike the other factories, they let you see right inside the sprayshop whilst robots apply the five layers of paint.

Dachau former concentration camp

Munich was not only the home to the Nazi movement, but also where their first concentration camp - Dachau - was established, which became the brutal model for many others around Europe. I decided to do one of the guided tours, which was a good idea as the guide gave a very good insight into just how bad it was, going round a replica of the dormitories, the crematorium and the prison. The camp in a nutshell, was a place that the Nazi's collected anyone who wasn't part of their plan, treated them appallingly, and worked them to death making things to further their war effort whilst lining their pockets. The camp was eye opening, slightly disturbing, and left me wondering how people could possibly have behaved like that to other humans.

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Neuschwanstein Castle

Germany had another crazy leader in the 19th century - Ludwig II - but thankfully this one was harmless; spending his time building wacky castles instead of murdering people, so on Saturday I took the train south to Neuschwanstein Castle in the foothills of the Alps to see one of them. The train journey was very nice with a great view of the mountains along the skyline, but because of it's popularity the castle was absolutely packed with tourists, and all you can get is a forty-five minute rushed tour late in the afternoon. After a stroll around a lake, both waiting for the tour and escaping the thousands of tourists, I wandered up to a viewing point of the castle, and as I rounded the corner it was one of those moments that just hits you; absolutely spectacular. Inside it was just as grand, but unfortunately for old Ludwig, seventeen years into building the place he was sectioned, then died before it was finished.

On my final day in Munich, I decided to hire a bike to explore a bit. I cruised round the Oktoberfest site which they were dismantling, stopped at the Deutches transport museum for a couple of hours, went to the Olympic park from 1972, and finished at the English Garden - a large and very beautiful city park. Autumn is in full swing here, and with leaves falling everywhere the park was beautiful. It seemed like everyone was out walking round - I've never seen a park so busy, and one of the busiest and most exciting points was on a fast flowing river where people were actually surfing. Very unique.

Munich was everything I expected it to be and more. Next: Prague, Czech Republic.